The month of May is now over. Posting daily, turned out to be a bust. The exercise was turning into a public stream of consciousness. No one wants to read that. The question that remains is,
did I find joy?
By turning my focus to joy, I started to understand this emotion. As an emotion, the state of joy revolves around circumstances. Not the “did I win the lottery?” type of circumstances. Of course, that would make anyone happy. I write that joy revolves around circumstances, in that joy is an emotion that is triggered. It is cause and effect.
In her TED talk, Ingrid Fetell Lee, lists situations, shapes, colors, and experiences that collectively generate joy. Today, I watched as 50 colorful, round beach balls were dropped from a fire truck’s extended ladder. It was a beautiful ten seconds, as they dropped. Kids and adults alike were transfixed at that moment. Afterward, I sat there watching the kids running and playing, joy everywhere. I couldn’t help thinking of Lee’s list. I happened to be in the right place at the right time witnessing collective joy.
I’m looking in the right direction for joy
This past month also taught me that I just touched the surface of this emotion. I, like an amateur, turned to the dictionary on day two for an understanding of the word. I was looking for answers about joy. Those definitions created more questions than answers.
I kept on exploring joy. Each post would bring up more questions or explore a question from a previous musing. I started to find joy in little moments, glimpses, or blinks.
While I quit posting daily, I was still pondering joy as an active emotional exploration. At one point I equated joy with contentment.
Looking back, I didn’t want the definition of joy, I wanted to understand the jargon of joy. Now that is a concept, the jargon of joy. Jargon is the way a particular profession defines a word. I came across the APA (American Physiological Association) Dictionary of Psychology. They list two types of joy active and passive. It turns out that as I was musing about contentment, I was feeling passive joy.
How can you start finding joy?
Full disclosure, I’ve never been impressed with self-help lists. The idea of 13 ways to find inner joy is trite to me.
I once listened to a guest minister at church. It was a great sermon, one that I could relate to. He told a personal story about a bible verse that changed his life. I wanted my life to change similarly. Try as I may, reading and studying that bible verse mentioned in the sermon didn’t change my life. That’s the way I feel about self-help lists. It’s like a spell that may or may not work. Just because you do everything on a list doesn’t mean your life will be instantly changed or better.
Back to the task at hand, how can you start finding joy?
It is simple. LOOK FOR IT.
There is no immediate fix to seeing joy in your life. The simplest way to find the joy in your life is to look for it.
Sure, things like meditation and yoga may help, but they help at a macro level. Exercise and meditation help with stress, your health, and your emotional state. Practices like these work towards contentment on many levels. Joy is just one of them.
On the micro level, understand that joy often appears in bursts. Feelings such as happiness, bliss, and euphoria are all outward expressions of joy.
It is simple. LOOK FOR JOY.
It takes practice to identify your emotions. the more you look for joy, the more you will experience it.
Finding joy, can’t be that easy.
There is a Field of Dreams aspect to looking for joy. “If you build it, they will come.” You have to put in the work to reap the benefits.
What makes you happy? Do more of that.
Bake a cake and lick the spoon, turn on your favorite song, call a friend, do something nice for a stranger, and play with your kids’ legos. I’m smiling just writing this list. I picture myself, not licking the spoon, but rather running my finger through a bowl of frosting. Tasting vanilla before it coats the outside of a cake.
I have a lot of happy moments and things I did just because of this joy experiment. It was wonderful. Sure, joyful bliss didn’t accompany every experience, but there were moments. Wonderful moments.