It’s time to implement a new kids chore chart. The dream: this will create a perfect cleaning system. The kids will willingly contribute to household tasks, completing chores flawlessly on the first attempt, no need for reminders or harping, be a completely fair system, and foster a living environment of peace and harmony. In reality this will not happen.
When things go awry with your chore chart
Here are five mindset tips to keep mama calm, cool, and collected. If you stay in the right mindset, the cleaning system you implement will be more and more like your dream cleaning system.
1. Take a deep breath
Or two, or three. Pause for a moment when things don’t go according to your plan. Take a deep breath and focus on the chores that are done. This is already less work around the house. From this mindset, you can decide what is next. Do you remind your child to do the task, finish the work, or show them how to complete the task? Remember, there is already fewer chores that need to be completed.
2. Remind yourself of the child’s age.
Kids can achieve great things, and expecting quality work from them is reasonable. However, this doesn’t imply perfection. If a child cuts corners, like shoving toys into closets instead of putting them in their proper places, it’s easy to feel frustrated. Remind yourself of their age when you feel pulled into a “you-did-it-wrong-again” mentality.
This seems like a silly tip, but reflect on it. Rather than thinking “So-and-so needs to learn their lesson” think “What do I expect from an ten-year-old?” “Do I expect a seven-year-old to rush chores on occasion?” Questions like these reframe frustrations and put them into a greater context. From the bigger picture, you can decide what to do next. Should you address the infraction with attention, redirection, a warning, or simply overlook it?
3. Remember the goal(s) for the chore chart
If you get caught in the frustration of implementing a new system, ask yourself why you are doing the chore chart. Having a clear understanding of your goal(s) will help frame any response and curb overreactions.
Chores are assigned for many reasons. What are your reasons?
- To teach life skills
- To help organization
- To teach responsibility
- To spread household work
- To create personal awareness
- to promote routine
Learning how to do laundry is a life skill. Learning to wash your sheets once a week is a healthy routine. So if, for example, the Saturday sheet washing is regularly skipped, but other laundry chores are completed, you need to address the routine. If the Saturday sheet washing is skipped along with all other laundry chores, perhaps another tutorial on how to use the washing machine is needed.
Whatever your goal(s), don’t forget to keep them in mind when you find yourself frustrated with household chores.
4. Try again.
Change can be challenging. Establishing a chore chart in your house may take some time before it operates smoothly. Allow for second chances. If a task consistently falls short of expectations, it’s okay. Take a moment to breathe, reassess, and try again. Consider whether modeling proper cleaning is necessary, and don’t expect perfection initially. If the chore chart isn’t progressing well with your kids, don’t give up. Encourage them to try again and learn from the process.
5. Pivot if the chore chart is not working.
Don’t let the chore chart stress you out. If the system is causing more harm (disagreements, stress, too much effort) than good, change the system. Remember the goal(s) for your chart and rework the cleaning system for good. Each of us have different cleaning habits, that includes our kids. Play to their strengths.
Happy Cleaning!
Always bear in mind that you play a significant role, in the success of your kids’ chore chart. Your mindset holds weight in shaping the household dynamic. When things get busy and stressful, don’t let the chore chart become an additional source of pressure. Recognize the value of your approach to their responsibilities. Having a positive outlook, ensures that your chore system remains a managable aspect of your daily routine.
For additional tips and tricks, I’ve been learning how to use ChatGPT to customize my household cleaning routine. Check out this article for more information.